a nightmare would be a life without you

It Ends Here, for now or something
Saturday, January 21, 2006 7:51 AM

So I don't hate him. And really glad I made that phone call because we usually don't ever find our flaws until someone is brave enough to point them out. We don't erase the flaws from our minds... Its just that... We've grown so used to it that we kinda forget they're there.

I never noticed myself doing that fake thing online. I don't know, maybe fake isn't the right word. Or maybe it is. Whatever it is... He didn't like it. I wasn't the same person on the phone, online or in person and the person he loved was the me when he talks face to face with.

The same way I didn't like how (really!) he sometimes was very slip-shod. Its true Wei Sheng. The way you do things make me feel like you don't really care about certain things. I didn't like how you always thought only you were right and how you would always be right.

He told me that after a bit of prodding yesterday. And even though it would have helped (logically) ALOT to have told me this earlier on instead of saying we were cooling off cos things were complicated. Okay I admit I'm pretty complicated. But I know for sure that if he told me that bunch of things when we were gonna cool off... I'd snap his head off or something. I realize that sentence reads two ways. Anyway...

He's right about me being a better friend. I prolly will make a better friend. (: My friends all think I'm sweet! :D I think you guys get the drift. Even though we loved each other, and maybe still do... Its just not working out at the moment so we're like finally single and free again.

I dunno how much he ever loved me, how much it will last and I don't want to think about how much, how long anyway... It ends here for now. Just friends.

carrie

P.S: The blog is like closed. Haha. Like obvious. Please update links to http://www.hope-unknown.net/chocoffee or http://chocoffee.blogspot.com

Sunday, December 11, 2005 12:15 PM

I suddenly remembered about the time around your 'O's last year. When it was our first month together. Maybe you've forgotten, and I have too. But its a good memory, one that came back just a few days ago...

Darryl: Do you think Wei Sheng will try his best to spend today with you even if its his o levels?
Me: No lah. Not that I'm skeptical or anything, but I don't think so.
Darryl: Will you believe me if I said he's here right now?

Excitedly I turn around, looking at the whole KFC restaurant...

Me: Huh? Where got?

Darryl points to a glass window behind me. Thumping on the glass is heard. I turn around and see Wei Sheng behind the glass window. And I jump in shock and surprise. I remember feeling so loved and happy. (:

Seeing the good, ignoring the bad... I've totally forgotten about this as the relationship went from one month to one year. I've totally forgotten about that...

Trolleys
Sunday, November 27, 2005 9:26 AM

XD I think dearie had alot of fun at the airport yesterday trying to convince me to try the trolleys. He wanted to race around pushing that thing, and I said, "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO." And when I did, I always tried to hop off... Its a rabbit thing. My rabbits do that kinda thing too. Like they say, like pet like owner. I take after my pets or vice-versa. If I wasn't so scared maybe dearie would have had more fun... But... ITS SCARY LAH! What if I fall down and break my forehead! That would be... :X Real bad.

Anyway, I've finally got hosting @ hope-unknown.net. My old blog is up again (Chocoffee), http://www.hope-unknown.net/chocoffee

I'll still come here to blog about stuff that happens to dearie and me, but some personal reflections will be at chocoffee because blogger is very lazy and cannot process my entries which are more than 3 paragraphs (or so) long. =C

Lots of Love,
carrie

Sweet sweet smell of impending success
Friday, November 25, 2005 4:06 PM

I'm hooked on a PC game I bought when I was 7. I NEVER finished it because I was too thick to notice the details... Now however, the game feels pretty breezy. I'm stuck a little now, but I think its cos I'm really tired to play the game properly. Solved quite alot of the puzzles already. I'm almost finished with the mystery! =) 8 more tapes to go and a bit more puzzles and I'll finish a game I tried solving unsuccessfully 9 years ago.

AND IT BEATS MAPLE! Heh. The game is called THE NEVERHOOD and I play this weirdo lead character made of clay living in a clay neighbourhood thats practically empty and eery and only corresponds (through his mailbox for clues) with a strange clay character named WILLIE THROMBONE. And he's a weirdo too. =X He's out to solve a mystery he doesn't know exists and collects tapes to unravel the story.

Gahaha. I can't believe it takes me 10 years to solve the easiest stuff! I must have been real thick. Will probably finish the game by tomorrow.

The O levels are over! I was bored, thats why I went to play NEVERHOOD. I've been out 'window' shopping spotting for the past 3 days. With Anisah and Bibi, then with TY and XY and Siu Lun, and then with dearie... Later, I'll be getting my new set of lingerie... Heh. I'm into the lingerie thing now... Its a weird kinda want-need feeling. =X I'll get a job and buy more kinda feeling. Oh. And I need a job. Getting DIY hair dye too. =)

Prom is coming... EEEE. And I haven't bought my shawl. Yes yes, I'll look like an AH MA lah, but I like, cannot ah? LOL. I need a job to support my growing appetite for cute lingerie. =D MUST GO JOB HUNTING and GO FOR INTERVIEWS. I'll start doing that after prom I guess. I need money. Aiya.

Lots of LOVE,
carrie

Uh huh.
Thursday, November 17, 2005 9:50 AM

Talk about all the wrong predictions... Right parts are bolded, parts that don't make sense... its in italics.

It's all about change, and lots of it. It could happen to your checking account first, and you're probably going to be prepared for it. If you're not, don't panic. Overreacting won't help the situation at all.

How cute. Yes. Change today, but I don't think I'll check my bank account leh. =P

I am gonna give dearie a NICE BIG SURPRISE.

Lots Of Love,
carrie

Carrie is FED UP lehhh.
Tuesday, November 15, 2005 11:27 AM

Carrie here is freaking pissed with Blogspot for censoring everything longer than 200 words on her blog. (I haven't counted but its up to three short paragraphs approximately.)

She has therefore lost hope in ever blogging anything close to slight intellect on elevenkids. She cannot even blog her feelings and observations of life. Anything more complex than "I ate chips and watched TT today." is rejected by the freaking blogger. She cannot even submit anything when she presses submit as long as its too long an entry! (BLOGGER IS LAZY I SEE... Shutting me up!!!)

She is therefore very frustrated and will be moving soon to greener and larger pastures for her creativity to flow. She is currently desperately in need of hosting, although she has of course a back up plan. She will still blog cutesy stuff here, but it'll probably only be cancelled out by blogger who probably hates her long winded ramblings...

This is just a notice. For all you know, she will probably be too lazy to move and still stay here. Until further detailed notice. Tata.

Lots of Love,
carrie

Holiday Plans Already?!
Sunday, November 13, 2005 7:06 PM

Yes. I'm all nicely getting ready for the long ardous school-less period of my life. My dad is already nagging at me about getting a job and making sure I don't waste my time at home doing nothing, lazing around. But I don't get it leh. Of course I will get a job lah! He thinks I'm very lazy. And I'm so disappointed he thinks I'd rather stay home than get a job and contribute financially to my family! =X Quite sad... BLAH. But yeah... Little does he know I'm already trying VERY hard to get lobang to get a job. I mean, I don't want to go rollerblading everyday lor! I like rollerblading but... I don't think thats how I'm gonna spend my first three months, my december hols and as well as the time from after first three months to poly entry. =X I mean! I'M NOT THAAAT LAZY!

So far I've got lobang from Sharudin to go stack books or something at Coral Primary bookshop for 4 days starting from after O levels. So I've pretty much confirmed the working period (which is damn odd) until end of the month. But from December onwards... I'd really like a job lo. My mom wants me to go tackle sales, but I DON'T MIND WAITRESSING! She thinks its... Not a job I should put as first choice, but its service industry also what! =X Aiya. I want Fiona's job. FIONAAA I want your job. I think working with you will be damn funny leh! I will laugh and laugh and laugh until my black face will permanently be replaced by a spastic happy smile and then the customers cannot complain about me! =) So you see... You are very very important. And I want your job. Your first day at work sounds so amusing I think I will ride the cable car up and down for your job. I think dearie won't want me to do waitressing... But... Sounds very interesting. And I don't mind pouring beer. I have no attraction for alcohol, but I don't mind pouring for other people leh. Aiya. =X Nevermind lah. Don't even know whether the place will even accept my application even if I apply. I'm only sixteen and Fiona's already seventeen lo... aiya. One step at a time lah hor?

Lots of Love,
carrie