But at this point of time I just wish I could stay at a stand still. Its like I'm unwilling to leave Secondary school. Its not as if I even LIKE school. I so started hating it since I bungled up (did something bad enought to get sent to the Discipline Master and not for latecoming) and felt totally uncomfortable whenever I'm hanging around in school after school hours. Its like I hate being there.
And with all that negative thoughts and feelings about school, I still wanna stay here, not move forward. Its just... Too much for me to handle. Or thats what I think at this moment in time.
I'm scared? Am I scared?
No... Maybe... No...
Shucks.
Just yesterday or two days ago, Sebbie (class chairman) broke the news to us... Prom is on. :X
Its supposedly (so I'm told) the most important event in anyone's life since Secondary school is the most memorable time of anyones life... But I'm so unwilling to go. Its like theres nothing there for me. I can't dance (fact), I can't wear a dress (fact), I can't look good in a dress (SUPER FACT), I don't have anyone in school I want to go with anyway (FACT), and I'll be the ultimate light bulb if I hang around TY and XY... :( Eeee. I don't want.
But I succumbed... I put the little blue tick next to my name anyway because if the class is going, I'm going. Thats because I won't wanna miss all of us in the future without pictures of people dressed up, of people trying to dress up, and of gay pink shirted guys from class and cute little girls in dresses. It will be nice to see them dress up. :) I wish I could go in like tailored pants or something? It would be cool... :D But my mom told me it was really dumb to wear pants to prom... XY said NO ONE would wear pants to prom.
And I listen. I'm such a spineless freak.
GAAAAAAH.
I miss Jill! :C Its like she was the first person I knew who I clicked with right away even when I was upset and everything (she was my "ex-love rival"). It was like we just talked and chatted and we hit off great... Shes really a good friend. VERY GOOD FRIEND...
I think I'll convince my dad and mom to let her come over during the school holidays for a movie marathon (a break from the mugging schedules!) and a huge dose of popcorn. We decided we'd hang out soon... Just so happened 9th September was the first time we met each other (last year)... Its almost a year... So soon. And again, cliched as it may sound... Time just flies... :X
I can almost see my life in black and white, sepia maybe... Weird.
Back to mugging, carrie
This blog contains the memories of two people who hated each other at first, managed to get to know each other anyway, got attached for a year plus and then decided to break up.
They are very different people especially in personality and even though they love(ed) each other very much, there are some things that because of love, you have to let go.
Just happened that it would have to be this relationship.
They now remain very very good friends. (Time will tell if this sentence actually holds.)
3rd October 2004 - 20th January 2006
His Wishlist Whiteboard
Plug-in Acoustic
More Polo-tees
some amazing sound system in my room
more time
large bed
large room
win lottery
basically everything else
disclaimer
Certain name(s) have been changed to protect the privacy of the person(s) mentioned in blog entries.
This is done in view of the number of people who are able to access the blog. Also views expressed on this blog are usually done at the spur of the moment.
Forgive the writer (specifically carrie) should she unknowingly offend. Excuse her. However like every other blogger in this blogosphere,
she is still accountable for her blog entries.
